Greetings to you all from the first day of 2016! This time every year, we are prompted to make resolutions to make us or our lives better. I think I stopped doing this when I was in my early twenties and the resolutions were falling by the wayside long before the end of January! I was beginning to think it was me until I realised that what I was trying to do was unrealistic unless I did some careful planning.
I tend to set goals rather than make resolutions these days and for the most part, it works pretty well for me. A few years ago, I decided I wanted to study again and actively planned and organised my life to accommodate a part-time university degree – something I will never regret! And last year I had multiple goals, to blog more regularly and write more, start a sourdough plant and make bread again (very successful) and stop dying my hair, which has been possibly the most fulfilling and oddly empowering thing I’ve done in years!
I started going grey very early, as my father and grandmother did and as it became more noticeable, I covered it up with every colour imaginable. It was kind of fun but also tedious, dealing with regrowth and how the dye stripped my hair but increasingly, as I went into middle age, I felt it played too much into the myth of youth equating beauty. Just to take it another step further, I decided to put my hair in dreadlocks as well. Despite what people might tell you, having dreads does not mean having dirty hair. I still wash it as much as I did before but using a different kind of shampoo and never using conditioner.
Me being a loudmouth – image courtesy of Josh Troy
Now, a year beyond my decision I’m very happy. My baby dreads are mostly silver and what’s left of my natural hair colour. Sometimes people look at me strangely but I’m a career musician – that’s happened all my life so I think I’m used to it. I’ve had a couple of derisive comments, but I think it says way more about the people making the comments than me.
The bottom line is, at 57 I’m comfortable with who I am, I like the woman I have become, I like the way I look, love my life and I make no apologies for being myself.
On a related note, I went and saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens this week and found it really enjoyable – not brilliant, but fun – particularly with the inclusion of the original cast. So, imagine my sadness when Carrie Fisher was derided on social media this week because of her looks and how she “hasn’t aged well”, whatever that’s supposed to mean. Mind you, her response was glorious, witty and suitably scathing;
“Youth and beauty are not accomplishments, they’re the temporary happy by-products of time and/or DNA. Don’t hold your breath for either.”
Wherever you are, I hope your 2016 is full of love, happiness and laughter – live life well!
Debra ❤
Debra Manskey 